There are several reasons why we we adopted from Ukraine and I will list them:
1. We wanted to adopt a child that would blend in with our family and not stand out as "adopted". Sadly, there is still a stigma with adoption. We live in an area that is not very culturally diverse and fairly conservative. We didn't want to make life any more challenging for our children. We also thought a caucasian child would be more accepted by our extended family. We don't mind talking about adoption and are not ashamed in any way but we didn't want strangers saying unkind things to our children in the grocery store line! We didn't want other children telling our biological children that their bi-racial, or different race sibling was not their "real" brother or sister.
2. We found out that since we already had two biological children we were not eligible to adopt a non special needs child through our church.
3. Local adoption agencies told us that if we limited ourselves to a young caucasian child that we would have a very long wait as they were in such high demand.
4. We did not have the confidence that a young birthmother would choose us in a private adoption. To a young mother looking to choose a family for her child we thought we had these stikes against us: We were a couple in our late 30's, we are very religious, and we already had a biological girl and boy. We also did not want to "market" ourselves in an attempt to improve our chances of being picked by taking out newspaper ads, building a "pick us" website, and talking to everyone we knew that we were interested in adopting.
4. Private adoptions can get very expensive and we would have no guarantees as far as outcome. The birth mom can change her mind after placement and get the child back.
5. International adoption agencies are VERY, VERY expensive!!!!! We also were not comfortable with the referral process of many agencies.
We liked Ukraine for many reasons.
6. Most of the children in Ukraine are caucasian children.
7. We could adopt from Ukraine without using an agency. I don't like the idea of anyone profiting in this way. Ukraine does not allow agencies to work in Ukraine.
8. There is no pre-selection of children in Ukraine. All children are registered with the National Adoption Center in Kyiv and this serves as the country's only "adoption agency". Families request permission from the Minister of Education in Ukraine and they are then approved to come to the National Adoption Center to begin the selection process.
In other countries, adoption agencies will offer a family a referral of a single child that they have selected. They usually provide the family a photo and a video. Most families will accept that referral and travel to adopt that pre-selected child. We had heard stories of families adopting from other countries where they bonded with the image of that child only to then lose their referral after a family member visited that child or the biological parents changed their mind. These families suffered a lot of grief and loss when this happened.
9. The National Adoption Center knows what orphanage at the time has the most children available in the age range and sex you are interested in and gives approval for you to visit an orphanage to meet them as well as any other available children. We really liked the idea of choosing our own child after getting a referral from them . We could interact with the children in person and get a feel for how we felt about them.
10. If we had wanted to, we could have continued to visit other orphanages had we not found our son at the first orphanage.
11. Children in Ukraine are free. There is no agency or government adoption fee as in other countries. Also, because we wouldn't be using an agency in the states, we would save A LOT of money! For this reason alone, adoption for us was possible.
12. We also liked that the whole process was much quicker than in other countries or the United States. Some people are ready to go in 2 months from the start of their process to travel date. Our process took 4 1/2 months.
After deciding to go to Ukraine, why did we work with Cathy Harris?
13. After learning about Cathy Harris, her reputation, and the wonderful support we would have from her and the other families via her private email group, I felt that we were in very good hands. Cathy had helped so many families realize their dream and the translators in Ukraine had proven track records and came highly recommended. I trusted her and the translators she knew in Ukraine to make our adoption happen. Even though we were going to do an "Independent Adoption", we felt like we would never be alone!
The Independent Ukrainian Adoption Family Network, or IUAFN
Our whole experience turned out to be a life changing event and I continue to be active in Cathy's network of families. As the network grew, we decided we needed to give ourselves an official name, the "Independent Ukrainian Adoption Family Network" (IUAFN). Our private email list has over 375 members with new families joining every week. Our motto is "Families Helping Families". We have members of the IUAFN in over 40 states available to help new members with state specific requirements. In the year 2000, 659 immigrant visas were issued to adopted Ukraine children for entry into the USA, 170 (about 25%) were helped by Cathy Harris and the IUAFN. We are estimating that for the year 2001, that number will go up to 35%. On October 18, 2001, the 401st family Cathy has helped, left the United States for Ukraine to adopt the child of their dreams.
Shortly after we returned from Ukraine, on Tuesday, September 26, 2000 in Washington, DC, Cathy Harris received a very special recognition:
The Congressional Coalition on Adoption Angels in Adoption awards 2000
A celebration of those committed
individuals making a difference
in the lives of children and families
"The Congressional Coalition on Adoption is a bicameral, non-partisan alliance of 150 Members of Congress dedicated to improving adoption policy and practice. The purpose of the Coalition is to focus public attention on the advantages of adoption for all concerned-the child, the biological parents and the adoptive parents.
Each year, Members of Congress recognize those individuals who have made a difference in the lives of children and families through adoption, and they are called "Angels in Adoption."
Rep. Virgil H. Goode, Jr. from Virginia stated:
"Cathy Harris has facilitated and supported many families adopting children from the Ukraine. A mother of five herself, Ms. Harris has helped dozens of families fulfill their dreams. Her efforts and experience benefit
both families in the U.S. and children in the Ukraine.
In addition to helping to build these families, Cathy Harris provides them opportunities to share their experiences through the organization that she created, the Independent Ukrainian Adoptive Family Network (IUAFN).
Ms. Harris is always willing to lend an ear or a shoulder, living by the IUAFN motto, "families helping families." She puts a complicated process at an understandable level, making adoptions possible where families might otherwise get lost in paperwork and international red tape.
Ms. Harris has provided invaluable support and assistance to the Guthrie family of Palmyra, Virginia,as they go through the process of adopting a Ukrainian child. Thanks to Ms. Harris, the Fifth District of Virginia hopes to welcome another young member to very soon."
To read the entire program:
http://www.senate.gov/~landrieu/newsite/adoption_book.pdf.
